Life's got something devious in mind

Soooooo..... my life has been seeming to take things into it's own hands lately, and I've been scrambling to find a way to keep up while still getting my own say in! I've really been feeling like I don't know how much more change I can handle, while at the same time feeling halfway detached from it all. This last part has really thrown me, but it's kinda nice because I feel much more relaxed about everything that's been happening than I would have in the past. So I guess that's a good thing.

The newest addition to the worm-hole of my life (I'm not sure if this is a good analogy - I'm trying to invoke images of not feeling control over anything but more like just being along for the ride and things are moving really fast and changing direction whenever they feel like it - maybe the Harry Potter Knight Bus is better for those who get the reference) is that I'm seriously considering leaving Hawaii to move to Santa Cruz. I'd be leaving my school and transferring to a new one over there that I think will suit me and be more along the lines of where I want to end up with my life.

This change has many implications and complications that I'm not super excited about dealing with, but as with all the other change I've been going through, I'm finding that I'm having a pretty easy time looking at those annoyances as worthwhile lessons to learn and that those things I should know how to deal with anyway. So why not just get it over with so I can move on??

I'm seeing a lot of advantages and exciting things to moving to California - closer to family, cooler climate (yay soup!), better quality food that is cheaper, more alignment with my personal philosophies mainly environmental awareness, better quality education, get to hang with Jesse..

but also some disadvantages - cold stinky ocean that I won't be able to play in, not as pretty mountains, loss of spiritual component of school and fresh local herbs (you know, the reasons my current school is great), won't get to live next to DnA anymore, won't get to live by myself, MOVING SUCKS, having to sell all my stuff (especially all my new apartment stuff!!)...

I think the stuff on the advantages list weigh a bit more heavily. And I've found myself able to say for the second time in my life (first time was when I moved here) that if I'm not happy, I can always come back to Hawaii.. It will still be here. BUT! with the way things have been going, I might have a completely NEW new plan in a week. We'll see!